Friday, June 25, 2004

ugh. for the first time in the past 2 years i haven't been able to keep up with the news. i don't mean that i haven't had enough time to actually follow the news, i really mean i haven't physicially able to do it. this has been growing in the bottom of my stomach. week after week, month after month, i keep telling myself. yes, we're in a shitty situation - maybe someone will finally wake up and ... ya know what? i don't know what will happen when someone does wake up and realize that this sucks, that people are dying, that we fucked up, that the reputation of the united states is eroding away while we watch and do nothing. But what could we do anyways? Protest? Fuck that - years and years of public dissent towards Vietnam had NO effect on public policy (Looped*). As inspired as i was marching through San Francisco (the city I am in love with) with hundreds of thousands of like minded people, I still feel that a decision was made years before the lefties could ever comprehend what was about to happen.

All of this has build up in my semi-consious until this morning. I read on my myyahoo news page about the attacks across Iraq yesterday and I just couldn't read it all the way through. I'm not sure if this means i'm just overly de-sensitized from the awful reports (ie: "I know...more people died in Iraq...same ol' same ol'") OR if i'm overly sensitive (ie:"I know...more people died in Iraq...i can't fucking take this any more"). I need to figure out why this happened exactly. Either way i just had to stop looking and race to a non-news website.

Argh. Too much thinking for a thursday night (the new friday)

* You've always got to refer to your sources.

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